Wednesday, May 13, 2009



Genius…..ahhh, how the word has a magical ring about it.

Club Genius is so exclusive a club that only very few great men or women ever manage to knock on its doors and enter.

Genius is the rare phenomenon. There is about one genius in a million. The majority of psychologists divide people into the ordinary people, talented people and geniuses. The majority of people are ordinary. But a rare few are geniuses. They are destined to the lonely and hard life. They develop the progress, make interesting inventions, make the great discoveries in their field, write books and open doors for all the rest of us. But they will be lonely.

The world is built in such a way that the majority of people don’t like most other people. Most of our communication with each other takes place on an emotional level, but this emotional level is not developed in geniuses. That is why the real talented genius is doomed to loneliness. Talented people must study at schools where they will be surrounded by other talented children and where specially educated people will take care of them.

“Genius” is a much-abused term. We abuse and overuse a great number of words and terms. For example, the word “awesome” connotes a thing or event that leaves a person wide-mouthed with awe, like a hurricane or a house-fire (or maybe a very significant other). Calling a cheeseburger “awesome,” may elevate the cheeseburger, but it deflates the word.

A cold-blooded murderer or corrupt politician may indeed cause outrage in the community, but to call an excellent order of fajitas “outrageous” stretches things a bit, don’t you think? The words “fabulous,” “amazing,” “fantastic,” and “phenomenal” are also widely overused.

But on to “genius.” Genius must transcend mere excellence. Doing a very good job at something is nice and sometimes important, but it is not genius. The genius sees what the rest of us can’t see.

We yearn for genius – to be reassured of the vastness of the human potential.

But maybe, just maybe, it is not that rare. Maybe it is in each of us, but we just have to get to it, discover it, uncover it. Maybe there is a genius in you, trying to get out. Maybe there is a beautiful pearl hidden deep within the shell. Have you ever experienced a brief moment when the vault opens and a glimmer of your brilliance is released? In these rare moments, you feel fully alive – energized, connected and in the flow. You don’t know where it came from but you do know it was rare, and special. You could feel the energy…you knew you were in the zone…you knew this is exactly what you should be doing. And then the vault slams shut again. You feel like a bird grounded, unable to fly. You don’t know how to get it back or where to turn. So you return to the comfort zone, settling for the ordinary existence.

Don’t let it just disappear never to be heard from again. Bring it back. Evaluate your life. Think about the times when you were at your best. Rekindle the fire, unleash the enthusiam and access the brilliance that lies hidden within you. Only you can unlock the door. Open the door and let your light shine. We need your genius.

Ya’ll be safe out there….Ric Justiss

“The essence of genius is to know what to overlook.”
William James

Monday, May 11, 2009

I Want to Hold Your Hand

Why do couples continue to hold hands, even after many years of being together? In a word - Connection! In a better word - Love! Holding hands has long been thought of as a first romantic step between a couple. And it may be. But it is also the last step for the old-timers. On their last day, you will find them still, till the end, holding hands.

To hold someone’s hand is to offer them affection, protection and comfort. It is a way to communicate and tell them silently “I am here, with you.” Usually it suggests something innocuous and sweet about a couple and their relationship. In some instances, it takes on added potency being an act of respect, like a handshake.

But, over all, few things are more innocent than a child grabbing the hand of a parent, for protection, direction and connection. And with many children these days closer and more outwardly affectionate to their parents, chances are you have spotted a mother and her teenage daughter and perhaps even a father and his adolescent son ambling through a mall, scurrying through a crosswalk or strolling along, hand in hand.

Likely, it was your mother or father who first held your hand when you began taking baby steps. Having a parent hold your hand while you were out in the world made you feel safe, protected from any harm. Later, hand-holding was likely done in friendship with your friends or family. Hand-holding during the dating scene was a whole new experience that made your heart skip a beat or two. Holding hands is definitely a heart-connected activity! Adult children and their elderly parents also hold hands, for balance, support and as a sign of love.

As for romantic couples, the opinions about hand-holding are as varied as fingerprints. But most people agree that it has not lost favor. If they do hold hands, it is likely only after they are deep into a relationship — not in those early days of budding romance, when a touch of hands was the first act of intimacy between a couple. That was the hand-holding that the Beatles wrote about.
Today, holding hands has become more significant than other seemingly deeper expressions of love and romance. Reaching for someone’s hand these days has more potential for rejection than leaning in for a smooch at a party where alcohol is flowing.

Whatever degree of hand-holding may be happening, there are good reasons to cultivate the habit. When we get more physical intimacy we get better relationships, whether a mother and an infant or a couple. Studies have shown that monkeys hold hands in reconciliation after a fight. We have learned that hand-holding relaxes the body. Put someone in a M.R.I machine, or other stressful situations, where they might at first be tense and afraid, and they will relax and start to feel more secure if allowed to hold their spouses hand.

Perhaps it is why so many people crave it. Holding hands remains a sign of intimacy between friends and lovers, couples and family, keeping two people together as they navigate the world around them. It as powerful a gesture today as it ever has been.

Holding hands strengthens your marriage relationship, creating a comforting and calming atmosphere in your home. It builds more trust between the two of you, and deepens your intimacy with one another. Holding hands is like a hug, sometimes friendly and some times loving.

Personally, I hope it never goes out of style! When was it the last time you held your dear ones hands and said silently “I care for you, and I am here for you no matter what?”

Have a good one…Ric